Home Is A Fire
by MEStarr
Summary: Veronica left for the FBI 3 years ago after breaking up with Logan for the final time. What happens when a case goes bad and she's given leave? Leave which coincidentally clashes with a big event back home in Neptune..there will be drama  LoVe, MaDi
1. Chapter 1

**Chapter One**

"Honey! Wake up! You're graduating today!"

I groaned and rolled over, pulling my duvet up over my head, "Duwannooo…" I mumbled incoherently, trying to block out the bright sunlight spilling in through my suddenly open windows.

"Come again? I didn't quite catch that." My dad replied happily, pulling back the duvet. I opened my eyes to shoot him a glare but only succeeded in wincing at the brightness.

"I don't want to go!" I moaned like a stubborn child.

"Up and outta girl! I made bacon." And off he went back into the kitchen; the source of that delicious smell. With a final grumble, I got up and stumbled into the shower; waking up properly as the warm water hit me.

So my final graduation was here. No more getting up at the crack of dawn for some totally irrelevant lecture. No more torturous criminology essays which I secretly enjoyed. No more lessons. A few more hours and my education would officially be over and I had a strange feeling of sadness somewhere under the excitement. Despite how much I claimed to despise all schooling; I felt I would almost miss it. Miss being part of something, a group. I was only twenty and already, due to all this school or college, I'd been through so much. We all had really.

I returned to my room to face the daunting challenge of getting dressed. What does one where to their graduation? I stood before my open wardrobe in my matching violet underwear and short white dressing gown; my hair pulled up into a messy bun on the top of my head. Compared to my graduation from high school, the range of colour in this closet had changed considerably. Lots of blacks, greys and whites. Blues, greens…a few dark purples, a red or two and even a couple of yellows. Pinks were virtually non-existent.

With a sigh I decided on a dress; not too formal but not casual. Mac and Parker had been panicking and planning their outfits all week but I'd, as usual, left it to the last minute. I dried my hair so it hung in loose waves; two sections pulled back loosely on each side and fastened with an old silver slide that Lilly had given me once. I put on some make-up before the dress, feeling fairly proud of myself when I looked in the mirror again.

The dress was a light blue/grey with an empire waist and fell to about five inches above my knees. I'd bought it with Parker the other week and I did like it a lot. Before leaving the sanctity of my bedroom I slipped on a pair of five inch black velvet high heels; I needed the extra height and I could walk in them so why not.

"You look beautiful honey." My dad smiled when I appeared.

"Thank you…" I muttered with a modest smile, sitting down and starting on the bacon. "You, my father, are the Bacon King." I sighed contently, finishing the plate not long after.

"Of course! No-one makes bacon like Keith Mars!" he grinned and I laughed, "Now finish getting ready. We're running late."

Ten minutes later I was getting into my car with my bad, robes and hat. Dad was going in his car to pick up Cliff; _obviously_ he had to attend. Everyone's lawyers attended their graduation! Although Cliff was more like an uncle to me, and one of my dad's best friends…

I pulled into the Hearst parking lot and was slightly taken aback by the vast number of people milling around. I parked and rushed over to where my friends stood. Wallace, Mac, Parker, Piz and Dick were all, save Dick, standing with their families.

"Arrgghh Ronnie! You look gorgeous! You're wearing the dress!" Parker squealed, pulling me into a bone crushing hug as she saw me.

"Someone's a bit excited." I smirked, hugging the others.

"So…everyone ready for freedom?" Mac asked, linking her arm through mine and Parker's. Dick flung his arm over my shoulders and I just laughed.

"Totally there Macster."

One hour later we were all dressed in our robes and hats and were sat in the huge gym. It took ages but, one by one, each member of our class crossed the stage and graduated. My heart skipped for a second when _his_ name was called and he strode proudly across the stage; cocky as always. He received loud cheers from all his fans and, naturally, Dick.

Logan and I had broken up last week. And this time it was for good…

_***Flashback***_

_ My phone vibrated in my pocket as I made my way across the beach. Pulling it out I noticed Logan's name flashing across the screen, "Hey Logan."_

"_Hi…umm…are you busy?" He asked, a strange tone to his voice._

_I frowned, whistling to Back-Up as he made his way quickly over to some little blonde girl building a sand castle; disaster waiting to happen. "No, just walking Back-Up."_

"_Okay, Dog Beach?" I replied affirmatively, "I'll be there in ten." And he hung up._

_I guess I knew what was coming. How could I not? Of course I didn't want it; I wanted anything but what I knew was about to happen. But really, it was inevitable. When I spotted his black SUV pulling up I turned to face the water, the wind whipping my hair across my face and my arms hugging my stomach. The weather was unseasonably cold and overcast; guess that's a bad omen. _

_He approached in silence, standing beside me. After a few minutes of a silence that neither one of us wanted to break, I spoke, albeit quietly, "So this is it?" It was a simple question without a simple meaning. _

_After a second or two he nodded, frowning at the horizon, "Yeah…this is it." Four words to break a heart. I hid it like I hid my blurring vision, "We can't keep doing this 'Ronica. We're just hurting each other more and more when we try and keep this together."_

_I nodded numbly, "So this would be that unbearable pain later that you talked about." He smiled sadly and nodded, "Well we both knew it would come to this." There was another longer silence. A tear escaped but I brushed it away before it got far, "I do love you Logan…you know that?"_

_He sniffed and looked at me, heartbreak in his eyes, "I love you too." That was the first time I'd really said it, "It's not enough though."_

_Again I nodded, "I know…too little too late." We'd been on and off all through our time at Hearst, trying to convince ourselves that we could make this work but all the while knowing that ultimately, whatever we did it would fail. _

_We stood in silence for a while longer before he spoke again, "But we won't forget each other right? I won't."  
>I smiled sadly, "I couldn't even if I wanted to." He nodded and turned to look up the beach. I stayed still, knowing full well that this was the end, "You'll do well Ronnie; I know you will." He leant in and pressed a kiss to my temple. I closed my eyes and attempted not to fall apart, "I love you." My eyes were clenched shut to stop the tears; I couldn't watch him walk away so I didn't.<em>

_Slumping down on the sand I cried silently, feeling totally broken. No matter what, all the way through school, I'd felt like I always had Logan. Not as back-up or anything…just there as a friend. But now that friendship was gone too. I returned home sometime after dark and the tears kept falling until I was asleep._

_The next day was Sunday so I stayed in and wallowed for a while. As night fell I left the empty house, got in my car and drove blindly around Neptune. I wasn't 100 per cent sure where I was going until I found myself standing before a familiar white, granite stone._

_I hadn't been here in a very, _very_ long time. Almost a year and a half perhaps. There was no reason for that, no excuse. I just didn't visit and I suddenly felt the guilt for that._

"_Hey Lilly." I spoke, kneeling before the freezing stone and tracing the inscription with my finger, "I'm so sorry I haven't visited, you probably hate me right now." I smiled sadly, thinking of my vivacious best friend, "So Logan and I are over…completely over…and after graduation I doubt we'll ever talk again. After all, I'm leaving for Virginia and I don't know what he's doing. I don't even know! I truly am the worst girlfriend in the whole world!" I pulled up a handful of grass and began absent mindedly shredding it. _

"I hope you're okay up there, probably Queen of Heaven or something. Self-proclaimed." I mused, "But you should be here shouldn't you. Four days until graduation you should be right here with me; valedictorian and all that shit. But so much has changed since you left us; you can see that. And it's about to change a whole lot more! But you'll always be here so I'll be okay; I always have you. I love you Lilly Kane…I'll see you soon."

_***End of Flashback***_

I sorted myself out as best I could; focusing on this summers internship at the FBI. I was lucky, this was the third summer I'd been asked back and last summer I'd loved it. I'd been able to actually put my detective skills to good use rather than making coffee. I was an expert at making coffee now.

According to Dick, Logan and him were heading of to Aspen for the summer, and then handing around Neptune surfing for a while. Of course, being who they are and their parents being who they…were?...the two of them never really have to work.

**A/N: You like?**

**Also, this is completely off topic and beyond far away from Veronica Mars etc and will only interest people who watch reality TV. But who agrees with me that there should be a section (like TV Shows, Movies, Books etc) for Reality TV fanfics. For example: The Hills, The City, Keeping Up With The Kardashians, Jersey Shore, Jordie Shore, TOWIE, Made in Chelsea etc. Just a thought but tell me what you think if you can be bothered : )**

**Thanks for reading**

**-M**


	2. Chapter 2

**Chapter Two**

**A/N: The case I'm using I got from the BBC program Luther…I'm sure it's on iPlayer if you feel like being terrified…or maybe I'm just pathetic. **_**Really**_** creepy…**

By the end of that week, Mac was in New York with her family, Parker was back in Denver with hers, Piz was with her there, and Wallace was off to Uganda for his third summer with Invisible Children. We were all really proud of him for that. Dick was surfing. And Logan had disappeared. No-one had any idea where he was and god dammit I was worried. Knowing him he was in Mexico with some of his friends getting wasted or arrested but I was still worried. But then again, I had no right to be. Granted I did try and figure out where he was, but then I had to leave for Washington and was distracted by everything. Especially by the weeks we spent in Quantico for training.

At the end of the summer I got called into the directors office, a man who we all new as Johnson. He offered a full time job in the FBI which I took without a moment's hesitation. He was pleased and stationed me in New York in the OCU, or the Organised Crime Unit. It was all fairly sudden but I was happy with it. My friends Callie Farmer and Seth Holland were also given jobs and stationed in the same section. Now that was luck.

Life as an agent was good; in fact…life as a _special_ agent was even better. I even had friends. Indeed I was even living with one such friend, Peter West, another Special. We had a two bedroom apartment in the city and it was perfect for us. He was a great friend, but I still had Wallace and Mac, then Weevil and, wait for it…Richard Casablancas Junior. Yes, shock horror. After Logan took off he blamed me for a while, then we both realised how ridiculous it was and, however much we denied it, we do have a fair bit in common. He and Mac dated for a while after Hearst, then broke up for some unknown reason. Both were more affected by it than I would have thought. This was made worse for Mac when he suddenly ran off in search of his absent best friend. We were all kinda pissed at that.

Last year thought, he returned out of the blue, skirted around Mac for a while before suddenly popping the questions. Quite literally out of nowhere.

Needless to say she said yes.

I was yet to receive an invitation to the wedding of the decade; they were off in happy pre-wedding land; commonly known as the Bahamas. It's alright for some.

"Marzipan? You there?"

I sighed and opened my eyes to see Peters face a few inches from mine, his usual grin in place. "It would appear so." I muttered, sitting up with a big yawn and a stretch. I'd been slouched down on the couch where I'd collapsed on arriving home after work.

"You look like shit Mars." He informed me, sitting down and taking a sip of coffee before handing it to me.

"Consider me flattered. Thanks." I took a big gulp, "Appreciated. You're back really late today. What time is it?"

He glanced at his watch before answering, "Almost nine. Hendricks wanted to talk to me about the case I just finished. And apparently he's got two big cases that he's handing out tomorrow."

"Ooh exciting. We better be on one of them together thought, he keeps splitting us up!"

"True, we shall fight back if he tries to." He said with a grin.

I smirked and he got up to make dinner. I stood and shuffled into the bathroom to take a shower. I did love Peter; he was one of my best friends and we'd been partners as such since my first week in New York. He'd been in the FBI a year longer and was that much older than me. Almost two years ago we got this flat together with the little money we had. But we'd managed to make it homey and perfect…through many paint wars…

That night we fell asleep relatively early, however when my alarm set off at 7 o'clock the next morning it was still too early. I showered before changing into some long black slacks, ¾ length sleeve shirt and a fitted black jacket with similar length sleeves. I pulled my long wavy hair into a high, untidy ponytail and slapped on some make-up before leaving the room.

We got to work on time at about 8:30 armed with coffee for the usuals and a couple of guns. Hendricks had called a meeting at 9 so we went straight in any waited with the others, handing the drinks to our friends Kioka, Callie and Seth. Hendricks was a tall, formidable looking man; he actually looked quite like the Director in the film 'Miss Congeniality'. But underneath he was really quite kind. "Morning all."  
>"Sir." People returned. This group of about 15 of the higher agents in the unit, we were all pretty close and comfortable around each other so our meeting weren't as formal as most.<p>

I was sat between Peter and Kioka, then Callie on her other side, "So we have two high priority cases." He began clicking the remote to light up the projector screen to the left of him. A grainy photo filled the screen of a dark street with a dark figure staring up at what I guessed was a CCTV camera from the poor quality. The man was in head to toe black with a hood up and his arms outstretched. Then his face was illuminated to show a distorted white mask. In his gloved hand was the rough shape of a long knife and behind him you could just make out the outline of another figure on the ground.

"That is creepy." Kioka murmured and I nodded in agreement.

"Indeed it is. But this was only the first." Hendricks commented, clicking to the next slide; a close up of a victim with a bruised neck, slashed deeply from left to right and eyes still wide open in horror. I swallowed and shook my head; the girl only looked about twenty. "There are five others so far. The police department working on the first murder had direct contact with him and learnt his name to be Benjamin Jack. He has no worried about us knowing who he is. He claimed to be a modern day 'Spring-Heeled Jack'. "

"What's a 'Spring-Heeled Jack'?" Johnny asked.

The name clicked in my head, I remembered Cliff talking about that when I was younger and he was having a weird obsession with folklore. "Ooh isn't that like, old British folklore? A Victorian urban legend or something." I asked, unsure.

"That's it. This legend supposedly could jump whole buildings, some ten foot tall beast. Put everyone in terror because he could hit any time, any place. This is clearly our guys intention." He explained, everyone was listening intently. "He's slippery though. You'll have a difficult job catching him." Ooh I wanted that case so bad! "Now the other case. That's a prostitution/drug ring based in New Orleans, Louisiana." He explained the case quickly, it wasn't that complicated, just like the cases we often got. Then the important bit, "Now, Agent Farmer, you will take the second case, Holland, you on that too." I have a chance…I have a chance, "Mars, West, you will both be taking the first case. You work best as a team and it needs the best." Holy shit I was excited! "Pick your teams. Dismissed." And he left the podium. Within seconds the four of us were surrounding by eager bribing agents. Twenty minutes later, we had our group and set to work.

The case was good. Our team of Kioka, Hiller, Jones and Reeves worked brilliantly. We were efficient and organised and we almost had the guy. Then the disaster happened. Johnny (Reeves) and Tamsin (Hiller) were taking an old friend of Benjamin Jack home from the station one night. She'd gone to an art college with him and we thought she might have some information on his background. While she was at the station we got a link straight from Jack. He was in his mask, holding a hand held camera as he walked down an unknown street. He placed the camera on a wall so we could see the houses across the street. We knew what was going to happen and raced to find the street name. By the time we got it the man had already answered the door and was gone in an instant. Jack just skipped back to the camera, gave thumbs up and switched it off. He was a psychopath. That took quite a knock.

Then came worse. Johnny went into the woman's house to make sure she was okay. He thought the Jack was around their somewhere and was on edge. He returned to the car to find Tamsin.

She was the next victim. A statement. Clearly saying that he really could get anyone. Anywhere.

Losing a member of your team's always difficult. Worse when they were a friend. But our anger just drove us on faster and harder. Our need to catch him became more personal. So we worked hard.

Two weeks and three hits later, I found myself in a dark, deserted house, hunting down our silent killer.

"He's around here somewhere V." I heard Peter's voice crackle through the small earpiece that we were using to communicate. I had a tiny microphone clipped into my bra as well so he could hear me. He was downstairs, that and my gun were my only comfort. I had that grasped in my hand. Hendricks, who'd gone extra precautious on us since Tamsin, had made us carry extra strong pepper spray too, so I had that at the ready in the other hand.

The room I was in was big and cluttered with dusty furniture and junk. I kept expecting to see that horrifying white mask, then hooked beak. My death right in front of me. I couldn't help but think that of all places to do this, how cliché of him to pick a derelict house.

"Of course he is Pete." I muttered in answer. If I saw him I'd shoot without a thought. I told myself I would. I would not freeze up. That would give him time and we all knew how fast he was.

"Fucking psycho…you can never hear him…"

I was going to respond. I opened my mouth. But then I caught my reflection in a dusty mirror. My heart stopped.

Not a metre behind me stood a dark figure, a white mask almost illuminated in that darkness. I couldn't move…if he knew I'd spotted him he'd have jumped me by now. Killed me. Hell, I was dead already. What could I do? And all I could think about was home.

I took a deep breath and acted without hesitation. If I was dying today, then so was he. My aim was something between killing him and alerting Peter's attention. I whirled around and fired two shots; one hitting his shoulder perfectly and the other missing his head narrowly. At the same time spraying pepper spray at him. I screamed at the same time, not expecting him to be so much closer. He fell backwards from the impact and I rushed backwards myself, gun raised for another shot.

There was shouting in my ear and the sound of running upstairs. A momentary distraction of glancing at the doorway was enough for him. He was suddenly up again, grabbing the gun from my hand, grabbing my neck tight with his own and slamming me back against the wall with all his might. A glint in his eye and a gleam on his knife…long…long knife…

"…" he breathed, raising the knife to my neck and pressing down at the end. I fought back weakly but struggling for the rapidly diminishing air made it difficult. I knew it was over the second the cold edge hit my skin. One move and I was gone. And faces began flying through my mind; all the photos of the other victims, Peter, Callie, Kioka, Tamsin, Hendricks, Dad, Dad, Mac, Mac, Dick, Wallace, Dick, Wallace, Duncan, Wallace, Mum, Logan, Logan, Lilly… "You made this difficult for me Ronnie." I blinked and aimed a feeble kick at this groin but misplaced and only managed to bump his leg.

"VERONICA!" I heard a shout from nearby, an echo in my ear. The knife dug deeper and I felt the skin break…warm liquid spilling down my neck…

"Please…"I choked out and he just laughed. Everything happened almost too fast to acknowledge. Another figure raced into the room. A deafening crack. The knife moving. Three more loud bangs. Pain flaring in my side and neck. Warm fluid spraying me all over. The blade scraping deep as he fell against me.

The sudden lack of his support made me fall with him, landing roughly on top of him but he was absolutely still. My vision was blurring, dimming as oxygen raced back into my head. I saw another body fall a few metres away, reached out an arm but too soon the world went black.


	3. Chapter 3

**Chapter Three**

Silence.

Perfect, peaceful silence.

Then it was broken; _beep…beep…beep…_My heart beat translated onto a machine. The room was bright. The smell of antiseptic lingering in the air. Bleach. Hospital.

The room was decorated in blue and white and was just like any other hospital anywhere in the world. Propped up on pillows so I was practically sitting, I could see the assortment of flowers and cards on the table, putting a smile on my face.

Before I could take anything else in, the door opened and Peter limped inside. I grinned as he saw me awake, instantly crossing the floor and pulling me into the biggest hug he could. I felt pain shoot through my side and neck as he pulled away, looking concerned, "Are you okay? How are you feeling? Should I get a doctor?"

I smiled at his rushed questions, "I'm fine," I managed, being painfully reminded that my throat had indeed been cut, "What happened to you?" I asked, not more than a whisper. His left arm was hooked up in one of those blue slings.

"Well when I got there I panicked and shot some rounds at him but then he had your guy and hit me in the shoulder. Then I hit him once more in the head and he died." He explained simply.

I blinked in surprise, so the psycho was dead. "Sorry." I sighed, feeling slightly guilty for letting him get my gun.

"Hey it's not your fault." He replied earnestly, taking a seat in a chair and pulling it up close to the bed, a nervous frown appearing on his face. "But…umm…I should apologize. But it was an accident! I feel terrible you have no idea! When I found out-"

"Peter! What did you do? It can't be that bad." I interrupted, amused.

He bit his lip and it struck me that I'd never seen him look so guilty or nervous, "Worse. I shot you Veronica! But it was dark and I was aiming for him and he was right in front of you and he moved really fast and I wasn't thinking straight! I didn't mean to-"

I wanted to laugh but I knew it would hurt so I settled for a grin, "Oh Pete that's fine! It's not your fault at all, you saved my life! Don't worry about it." He didn't look any less unsure. "Besides, what can I do? I can't even talk properly."

Re-enter frown, "Are you okay though? I mean, you almost died…kinda traumatic…well it was for me and if it wasn't for you then you're crazy."

I shrugged painfully, why did everything hurt! Shouldn't I be all doped up on painkillers or something? "I dunno, it'll probably kick in later. How long was I out?"

"Three days. You did get loads of visitors though. Quite popular you are!" Any tension in the room lifted quickly and we slipped back into our usual easy conversation. "I should probably get a doctor and call Hendricks; he's been worried about you."

"And you I bet. You were hurt too…but then again you were the hero." I joked lightly.

He grinned, preening" Me? Hero?...Okay then…"I laughed as he left the room to make the calls. Not ten minutes later a doctor entered named Dr Patel and he did a load of tests. Like following lights with me yes…fun. I wandered if my dad knew, but I doubted it because the last time something happened he was up here by the next day. And that was just minor assault on an undercover job.

Two days later I was released from the hospital; feeling stiff and groggy. Both injuries were held up with stitches and covered in bandages. Hendricks had places both Peter and I on leave, paid because if not we would get no money but only the pay of one of us. Then he'd said we had to take at least a month…which was kind of unheard of.

A few days after I was released Peter woke me up in the morning to say that Hendricks wanted us both to come in. Apparently he had something we might want to see. I groaned in reluctance; I just wanted to stay in bed all day. Then again, Hendricks also made us go to councillors once every three days and we both had physiotherapy to go to.

I carefully lowered my feet to the ground and sat up. Peter was already dressed so I quickly pulled on some black Nike tracksuits and a white tank top with a black hoodie on top. Why bother? I pulled my hair up to the top on my head in a messy bun and put on some grey high tops, brushing my teeth before leaving the room.

"You look lovely V." Peter grinned as I emerged from my room.

I shot him a faux-glare, "Alright sarky," He grinned and we went down to the cars. Within twenty minutes we were pulling up outside the headquarters. People looked at us as we rode up the lift and crossed the floor towards Hendricks' office. Our friends came over and others just gave sympathetic looks. I hated it. I didn't like sympathy.

When we entered the Director's office, we found Johnny and Kioka in there too. I was confused; a big TV screen had been set up in the corner opposite the small sofa area. "Mars, West. Good to see you two," Hendricks said in his usual formal way and we both nodded in return, "We just recovered an important piece of evidence from the crime scene. You may or may not want to see it and I've spoken to your councillor and she thinks that this could help in some ways."

I glanced at Peter, "I'll watch it, you?" He nodded in agreement and Hendricks pointed towards the sofa so we sat down. Kioka and Johnny took seats on either side and Hendricks went to beside the screen.

"Now I'll tell you before what it is. There were CCTV camera's set up in each room. We traced each and found that they'd been purchased by Benjamin Jack. So he set them up and…well…lets see," he explained before pressing play. The huge screen crackled for a minute before lighting up. It was split into nine different sections; one for each room. The light was dark and the quality poor but you could make out the rooms and the multitude of junk in each room. I couldn't recognize each one though, seeing it from a different angle and all. The clock in the corner read 10:34:08; I remembered that we'd arrived at about twenty to 11. Not a minute later we emerged on the top left screen; guns raised as we entered through the door. I watched as Peter silently pointed at me, then the stairs and him then to another door downstairs. I remembered it clearly. I see myself nod and we began to creep off in said directions. A second later we both appeared on new screens, me the upstairs landing. As my figure disappeared into another room there was a collective gasp around the office. Another figure appeared on the landing.

My heard began to race and I glanced at Peter as he took hold of my hand. The dark figure and white mask would forever be the subject of my nightmares. We all watched, captivated in horror, as the figure followed me all around the house, never more than two metres away from me; even when I turned he dashed behind something. He was so fast; if I didn't know better I'd say supernaturally fast…and silent. Peter was still creeping around on the lower screens but we were focused on upstairs.

Five minutes of being unknowingly stalked, me memories filling in the blanks and emotions, we got to _that_ room. We all watched as I froze, if felt like watching someone else. The camera was position perfectly so you could just see the shape of the reflection in the mirror. If felt strange watching it in silence. Strange watching me spin and shoot as the figure lurched forwards, then back as the bullet hit. Peter in the bottom screen froze and looked up, shouting silently before taking off out that room and towards the stairs. When I looked back at my screen I was against the wall and the blade was at my neck, you could make out that we were talking…well…'talking'. Then Peter was there and more shots were being fired, then the killer was falling, then me on top, then finally, Peter. All still. Not five minutes later the bottom rooms were illuminated with blue flashing lights and paramedics and the S.W.A.T team were racing inside, guns up.

Hendricks stopped it and turned off the screen. They were all watching us closely in silence. My heart was still flying after seeing the whole events unfolding in silence. The knowledge that the creep was behind me the entire time made me feel sick. In fact, I actually felt like I was going to be sick. "Air." I muttered before bolting up and out the room. Ignoring the looks of everyone else as I made my way quickly into the bathroom. Then I suddenly found myself throwing up in the toilet. When I was done I sat back, pressing my throbbing neck. God, I couldn't do anything! I felt a trickle of blood and wiped it away with the back of my hand.

"Veronica?"

I sighed, "I'm fine," I called back, standing and leaving the cubicle, splashing my face with cold water at the sink. Kioka hovered by the door, unsure, "Don't worry, seriously. Just a bit of a shock that." I smiled at her, taking a drink to try and rid the horrid taste from my mouth, then some more water to wipe away the blood without getting the bandages too wet.

"Yeah I understand. That was horrible to watch." She nodded, reaching out a comforting hand to my shoulder, "You want to go back?" I nodded and took a deep breath before leaving the room with her. Peter was there the second I re-entered the room, looking worried.

"Calm, Pete. It's okay." I assured him as we retook our seats.

"You alright Mars?" Hendricks questioned and I nodded with a small smile, "Alright, well I thought you might want to see it. I'll be telling your councillor of your reactions to it."

I nodded, "Thanks Sir." Peter said, "So what now?"

He thought for a minute, "Now? I don't want to see either of you two for at least a month, as I said. You'll take as much time as you need and you'll relax. Go see your families, friends; I'm sure we've kept you away from them for long enough." We both smiled and nodded, "Recover, you need to." He dismissed us and we left.

The next day I received a posh looking wedding invitation. Mac and Dick had finally picked a date it seemed. There was an extra note from Mac saying that if I missed it she would no longer by my 'Q' and she'd come up here and kill me. I laughed and looked at the invitation. Of course it was next week; any letters sent from here to Neptune or vice versa were always lost in the mail for ages. The invitation was also for Peter, they'd met a few times and got on well; plus he was my best friend. Then it also added at the end as a PS that I was maid-or-honour...right.

Peter knew more or less everything about my life in Neptune. From the PCHer's to the Fighting Fitzpatricks. He knew of Logan and our complicated history, The Kanes and all that entails, including the Sorokin's and that drama at Hearst. He knew most of what could make an awkward conversation. After he agreed, I found myself happy that he was coming. He was good support and great to talk to, then he was with me on all this Jack stuff. That's what we knew it as, the Jack case…or if you wanted to be extra; Spring-Heeled Jack.

That weekend we decided to go on a cripple shopping trip. It was slow and at times painful but we managed perfectly. People looked at us weirdly; Peter with his obvious bullet wound due to the sling and me with a white bandage stuck to my neck. By Tuesday Peter was well and truly back to his usual charming self and could take the sling of for five hours maximum per day. He just had to be careful and not stretch it too far. Me? I couldn't turn my head, I couldn't look up, and I could just about look down. Then I couldn't twist if I wanted to, and could do just about no exercise. Life was….great.

**Bad place to end but it was the only half decent ending before the chapter got too long. So..sorry about that : )**

**Thank you for all the reviews and alerts; they really are good motivation to write more.**

**-M**


	4. Chapter 4

**Chapter Four**

**Sorry for the massive wait, I go through phases of programs and for the last few months I've been in the wonderful world of the Vampire Diaries and Ian Somerhalder. Anyhoo, I have returned for now. **

**I****also****found****a****photo****of****the****killer****dude****in****Luther,**./imgres?q=luther+BBC+mask&um=1&hl=en&rlz=1C1CHNV_enGB452GB452&biw=1280&bih=709&tbm=isch&tbnid=lKsgtyZ1QkXRLM:&imgrefurl=.com/57196/thud-review-luther-season-2-episode-1/&docid=-MeJZDSUyrSOgM&imgurl=.&w=1024&h=522&ei=wZLbTs_eB8OQ8gO09L35DQ&zoom=1&iact=hc&vpx=173&vpy=437&dur=1820&hovh=160&hovw=315&tx=183&ty=106&sig=101682287844682564036&page=3&tbnh=151&tbnw=220&start=31&ndsp=16&ved=1t:429,r:11,s:31

**Creepy**

**Thank you again for the alerts and reviews. I know the whole coming back for a wedding storyline isn't very original but it was an excuse to bring her and Logan back to Neptune. I hope this isn't too much of a disappointment…**

Despite all that we got on that plane and in less than seven nerve-wracking hours we were touching down in sunny California. "You still feeling up to this V?" Peter asked as we helped load our bags into the taxi.

"No, but I'm doing it. I haven't been back here in three years." I told him. My voice was still quiet and slightly husky but much less noticeable. Pete's only comment when he wasn't teasing was that I sounded sexy…which I wasn't sure how to take…

The ride to and through Neptune took barely any time at all. I promised to give him a full tour in the next few days. We pulled up outside my Dad's new house where he lived with his wife Alicia (yeah they got married) and Darrell, her son, Wallace's brother. I now had two brothers. The second we were out of the cab, paid and unloaded, the door flew open and my father rushed out. I'd seen him last three months ago when he came up to New York for a visit. Still he dragged me into a huge hug that only he could give. After wincing and biting back the shoot of pain, I sank into him and smiled.

"I'm so glad you're home honey." He grinned, stepping away and shaking Peter's hand. They'd always got on well, ever since they met last year. I think that Dad thought we'd get together, I knew that Peter was the kind of guy he would want me to be with. But we were best friends, really close but nothing more than that. That would be like me and Wallace together…just weird.

He led us inside where we say Alicia and Darrell, who had gotten a whole lot taller! After than Alicia showed us to our rooms; two adjoining rooms on the upstairs landing. The house was big; bigger than I expected. Four bedrooms would always be big by my standards. By the looks of it I'd taken Wallace's room, which was pretty empty. He had moved out by now; living in a large apartment with his girlfriend of two years, Allanah Paige. I'd met her once and she was lovely.

By the time we'd semi-unpacked it was almost lunch time so we went downstairs to eat. I loved how easily Peter fitted into the family, just like yet another new brother. Speaking of, just as we finished eating Wallace arrived home. He too pulled me into a big bear hug, "How ya doing Supa Fly?"

I grinned, "All good Papa Bear. You? How's Allanah?"

He shrugged, "Good good. You'll see her tomorrow at this wedding of the century." He sat down and shook Peter's hand before everyone fell back into conversation. Later that afternoon he drove me over to see Mac in her and Dick's huge beach house in the 90909 section of town (of course). There were people rushing around everywhere with clipboards and fabric; final checkups before the big day. I found Mac in what I guessed was a rather lavish looking living room, looking at a navy floor-length dress on a mannequin. She was dressed in tracksuits and a tank top, looking amazing with her new slim wedding body.

"Heya Q."

She literally leapt out of her skin, spinning around, "VERONICA MARS!" she squealed, launching at me into a hug. I winced but masked it quickly, overtaken by excitement of seeing my best friend again, "Oh my God I can't believe you're back! How are you? You look great!" she gushed, dragging me over to sit on a sofa.

"I am great. Everything's just a little surreal. Good to be home though; of course I couldn't miss your wedding! That letter was scary Woman!"

"Good. I'm getting married tomorrow!" I laughed at her sudden exclamation, "To Dick friggin' Casablancas!"

"Truly words I never thought I'd hear you say…actually, anyone for that matter." I mused and she laughed, and then looked at me closely for a minute. I felt strangely self-conscious under her gaze and fought the urge to cover my throat. Despite the heat I was still wearing a woolly grey scarf; hey, it was comfy, though a little warm. It was better than a million questions.

"Your voice is different…" Oh shit, "Have you been smoking again?"

I almost laughed, shaking my head. "No Mac, don't worry, my lungs are perfectly intact. I was just a little ill last week, still there slightly." She's always been against smoking and probably always will be. I used to do it sometimes, often, weirdly, with Dick. That was after we became friends but before he took off.

"Aw, well…sounds pretty cool anyway." I smiled in thanks, I didn't mind it myself; just wanted my normal voice back. But the doctor did say I might be stuck with this. We talked non-stop for about two hours, and then tried guessing where the surprise honeymoon would be. I thought the Caribbean while she was set on Italy. "Ooh V you have to try on your dress! Monica's still around somewhere just in case it needs adjusting. It's that one there."

I looked over to see the beautiful blue dress which she'd been looking at when I arrived. "Really? I thought that would be your dress for the reception or something…it's amazing!" I stood and walked over to it, stroking the silky material.

To try it on I went into a huge bathroom just down a wide hallway. It was simple and slim cut, hugging my barely existing curves and the skirt flowing straight to brush the floor. The top was tight and had straps to hold it up about an inch wide. Everything about it was incredibly elegant, though I'd have to wear heels and pick it up off the floor.

"Wowza…That's perfect." Mac smiled as I re-entered the room, turning in a circle and the skirts flew out a little. "You're going to look better than me!"

"Absolutely not possible." I countered, "But thank you, it's a beautiful dress."

"Thank Dick." I looked at her in confusion, "Well he wanted something to do with the wedding and I told him that he could pick your dress but if I didn't like it then I'd change it. He picked out that one."

I looked down at the dress again, then back at her in disbelief, "_Really_?"

She laughed and nodded, "He actually has pretty damn good taste."

"I would never have expected it." I smiled, and then returned to the bathroom to change back into my clothes before sitting back down on the sofa. While there I got a thought, "Hey Mac, am I going to have to give a speech? 'Cos I am _really_bad at them and I-"

"No, don't worry about that. We already have quite a few. My parents, then me and Dick, Wallace, Parker and-"

"The Best Man." I finished, nodding, "Who I'm guessing is Logan." She bit her lip and nodded, watching me warily; I let out a deep breath and shrugged, "I knew he'd be here. Though still surprised that he decided to show up again. When?"

She sighed, "Two weeks ago. I know he's been gone a long time and you're annoyed at him for that; we all are. But he has changed, just like you have."

"Two weeks! You could've warned me Mac! Given me a little preparation time!" I exclaimed with a smile.

"Sorry! I thought it would be obvious. He and Dick are best friends and all." She said to justify herself.

"Oh well, it's not that bad." I sighed, and then checked my watch, "Right, it's almost 6. You need to get ready for your Hen night." I informed her with a smile.

"You're coming! You have to! I can't have my last night of freedom without you there."

I thought for a minute. Truthfully I just wanted to go home and sleep. Dr Patel had warned me away from alcohol which so far I hadn't totally managed (just a two beers). Sure there would be Parker, but I didn't really know any of Mac's girlfriends. Then there was the issue of the injuries, I couldn't do much with them. "I dunno Mac, I'm kinda jetlagged and we all have to be up early tomorrow…"

"So we'll all be tired! Make-up! C'mon Bond, I need you there." I sighed, how could I refuse? I'd do the same to her. Then again, when was _I_ ever going to get married?

"Fine! Fine. But if I ruin your posh wedding photos then I apologize in advance."

She let out a squeal of excitement, "Never! Plus, there's always Photoshop!" I gaped at her in mock offence and she laughed. We said goodbyes not long after and I headed home to prepare for this girls night out. I found Peter in the living room and asked him to come up to 'my' room with me.

"Okay, I have a problem. I have to go to Mac's hen night tonight. Cue heavy drinking and endless dancing." I rushed the second the door closed. He sat on the end of the bed, and listened with a frown.

"Well did you try and get out of it?"

"Of course I did. But she'd my best friend. I can't do that to her. Plus, I'm maid of honour and not giving a speech; I can't skip her Hen Night too." I explained, crossing to my suitcase and looking through it. I'd brought a few nice dresses, just in case this happened.

He thought for a minute, "Okay, then go. Just be really careful V. No crazy dancing. And for heavens sake don't drink anything." I nodded slowly and scratched my neck carefully, "So I'll see you later. Have fun babe." He said before leaving the room.

Quickly I pulled on a simple black bandeau dress which stopped at mid-thigh. My hair I left down, then some black four inch heels and make-up. At the last minute I pulled on my studded black leather jacket, slipped my purse and phone into the pockets. I went into the bathroom and cautiously peeled back part of the bandage on my neck to inspect the cut. It wasn't faded but much better than last time. It was cleaner; the stitches were dissolving ones and were almost gone now that it was pretty much healed together on its own. Perhaps tomorrow I could go without the bandage? But not tonight. Thank god the new ones that the doctor had given us were more or less flesh coloured.

The party consisted of Mac, Parker then Mac's friends called Rosie, Eloise and Tamara. They were all very excited and Parker and I had quite some catching up to do. She was always over-excited so I thought she was on the verge of having a heart attack at one point. By 11 we were in a heaving club downtown and they were all past tipsy. I'd had a few drinks but, first I knew too many and I could have a problem, second, it kinda hurt to drink or eat.

We got home at about one in the morning and I went to bed knowing that I really was going to feel like crap in the morning.

And I was right. Alicia woke me up at 9 am with a steaming mug of tea and I took it appreciatively, sipping it slowly and carefully. The wedding was meant to officially start at 1 o'clock so we had plenty of time. I literally crawled into the shower, washing my hair slowly. Then I began grooming head to toe; waxing, eyebrows plucked, toenails painted, hair dried…the lot. The day before we left, Monday, I'd gone to get my nails done at the best place I knew; the French manicure was still perfectly intact. I returned to my room in my all black underwear; a lacy black push-up bra just for the sake of it. I redressed the gun shot wound so it was as subtle as I could make it. Then the same to the neck wound; I cut of the smallest piece of the bandage I could so it just hid the cut.

Downstairs I found everyone already there, waiting for me. I was always the last to finish! "You look amazing V." Pete said with a grin.

"As do you, nice skinny tie." I smiled back, and then I noticed something else, "No sling?"

He shook his head, "Nope, I have five hours. I intend to exploit it." He sighed at me cautious look and biting of my lip, "It's fine Mars, I am allowed."

"Well be careful." I instructed him and he just smiled back.

Wallace drove me to the huge church to arrive by 11:30, an hour and a half to help the last minute preparations. I found my way into the large room set aside for the bride to get ready. And there was Mac, standing on a pedestal in an absolutely stunning white dress. It was long, spilling out onto the floor with the long skirts. The top almost wrap-around with thin white straps and a loose tie. It was absolutely gorgeous and looked incredible on her. "I'm speechless." I informed her with a smile before hugging her carefully. "It's amazing Mac."

"Thank you, that dress really is perfect too." The other bridesmaids entered the room; Parker, Rosie, Eloise and Tamara in simple blue empire-waist dresses. They too all looked fantastic. We talked for a long while; laughing over last night, wondering what people will be wearing, thinking about the honeymoon…everything. With half an hour to go and the excitement steadily increasing, Mac asked a certain question, "Hey Veronica…have you seen Logan yet?"

"I don't appreciate that, it is going to be _so_ awkward and tense!" I sighed, standing up slowly but still getting the usual surge of light-headedness and stumbling a little, "I'll go now. Before I have to stand in front of him for an hour while you get married." I said, shooting Mac a mock-glare and she just smiled smugly at me. I said a quick goodbye before leaving the room in search of the 'ex'-love of my life. Not that I ever told him that.

I knew Dick was in another room near the back of the church so I made my way there. Outside the door I heard the sound of laughter and knocked, a minute later it opened to reveal an incredibly excited Dick Casablancas.

"RONNIEKINS! YOU'RE HERE!" he literally screamed, dragging me into a massive, painful hug and swung me round, "I'm getting married in twenty-eight minutes!"

I laughed, stumbling slightly as he let me go, "Heya Dick," He pulled me into the room and all of a sudden I found myself face to face with one Logan Echolls. I gulped, my heart going just a little mental. He looked somewhat shell-shocked himself; pushing himself away from the wall he was leaning on, "Logan…"  
>"Veronica…" Oh lord this was going to kill me, "You came."<p>

"Couldn't miss it. Best friend and all." I said quickly, awkwardly.

He smiled slightly, "Same here."

Suddenly an arm was being thrown over my shoulder again, "Aww _Ronnie_! I'm your best friend?"

First I flinched a little at the name, remembering it coming from a very different person's mouth and a shiver ran down my spine. Then, correcting myself, I stared up at Dick like he'd just grown another head, "Richard…" he winced and slowly turned his gaze down to me like a little boy who knew he was about to be told off, "Are you drunk?" He actually let out a little giggle, what was this! "Dick I swear to _God_-"

"Dude! Take a chill pill woman! I'm not drunk, I'm high…" my mouth fell open and he rushed on, "…on life! And love! You should try it…or maybe you are…?"

Wow the tension in the room that he was oblivious to just sky-rocketed. Hello awkward. I avoided all eyes, "Okay, this just got awkward. I'm gonna go…fulfil my maid-of-honour duties. You two; stay calm, frosty…find your Zen." I said, before making my exit. As soon as the door closed behind me I felt like I could breathe again. Jheeze, I could barely even look at him! Three years and I was back to acting like a little school girl with a crush, back to innocent pre-Lilly Veronica. Somehow. Dammit I was Veronica Mars! Special Agent for the friggin FBI! Some would say I _enjoy_ danger…right now I was being pathetic.

Ten minutes later the music began softly in the church and the huge number of people turned to look at the aisle. Dick and Logan took their places at the end of the aisle on the three little steps. I said the church was big, it was completely full, every pew. Ella and Marisa, Mac's two young cousins in pretty white dresses and flowers in their hair, made their way down the aisle, dropping white petals as they walked. Then me, Parker and Rosie. Fuck, I was walking down an aisle towards Logan. This was so bad! I felt like _I_was about to get married! Plus he was watching me. Damn. But still I plastered a small smile to my face and gripped the small white bouquet in my hands tight, smiling at the people I recognized on the ends of the aisles.

As I reached the end I let out a silent sigh of relief. Then I took my place on the middle step, across from Logan. Parker was close right next to me on the next step down so if I got dizzy, which I definitely would, I could lean on her. Hopefully she wouldn't mind.

Just then the entire congregation stood up to face the aisle as Mac made her entrance, her hand gripping her dads arm tightly and a huge smile on her face. There were collective aww-ing and murmurs as people took in the dress. I glanced up at Dick and couldn't help but smiled at his expression; he looked like he was in heaven, his eyes only for his almost wife. Before long she'd been given away and was standing beside him, handing me her own larger bouquet and we shared a small smile before she quickly turned it up to Dick.

"We are gathered here today…

**-Click the link for a picture of Mac's wedding dress. Like or not, it's simple and I _want_ it!**

_**()**_

**Okay, so I apologize in advance but I have to do this. It applies to pretty much everyone posting stories…no review…no update. I don't mean to bribe you…but I suppose that is bribery. They are all greatly appreciated. Thank you for reading : ) **

**-M**


	5. Chapter 5

**Chapter Five**

The whole ceremony took almost an hour. An hour of trying to avoid Logan's gaze while standing facing him. My neck and side were aching and I wanted to sit down but couldn't yet. When I started swaying slight Parker subtly took my hand and shot me a questioning glance. I'd smiled and shaken my head slightly, but keeping a hold of her hand for support. It was all beautiful and lovely but oh the relief when they finally were announced man and wife, kissed and descended the aisle.

Typically I had to walk down beside Logan who let us get almost to the end before speaking, "We need to talk Veronica." Simple, very true.

"Not now. Find me later." I wasn't exactly looking forwards to the talk, but it had to be done I guess.

The reception was held at a large beach house in the 09er district. It was huge and like a French villa; a massive wide veranda out back with a stunning view of the ocean, glistening in the Californian sun. Every wall had all manner of plants and flowers creeping up and around the blue shuttered windows. To the side and down a few steps lay a large pool and surrounding decking, even a mini-bar. It was amazing; if I was rich this is the type of place I'd want to live…

The many circular tables with white clothes and laid for a meal were arranged in a U-shape, a large dance floor in the centre. Then on the other side was the long rectangle table set apart for the bridal party. Music was playing softly through the speakers cleverly arranged around the room so we couldn't see them. There was a buzz of conversation in the air as everyone found their seats. I was placed between Mac and Parker on the long table, surprised at having the important place. Before I sat I made sure Peter was okay, on a table with my Dad, Darrell, Alicia, Cliff and a few others I didn't recognize. I found Weevil too, and we had a massive hug and catch up. I'd missed him a lot. He was now married to a woman called Jessica and they had two three year old twins; Sophia and Marcos.

The food was served by a big group of waiters and waitresses all dressed in black trousers and black shirts, looking very smart. They were quick too, and happy; all smiling. After that came the speeches, which were all brilliant. Parker's and Wallace's were really good; Wallace's made me laugh when we talked about the three of us, the founding members of our 'Scooby gang'. Logan's was, of course, hilarious. Then Mac's parents together gave an emotional one. Dick's speech was so…_Dick_, but I was impressed. Then came the cutting of the mountain high cake, followed by the Mac and Dick's first dance as a married couple. That was such a strange thought. I watched with a smile but I knew I needed to take some painkillers; I'd had one before we left this morning and I'd just forgotten to take another so the pain was a lot more than usual. As more people took to the floor I politely excused myself from the catch-up Parker and I were in the middle of. As I passed my dad's table the dizziness peaked and I stumbled slightly, hand to my side as it burned. In an instant Peter was there and guiding me quickly inside, glancing around to make sure no-one noticed.

"You okay? What's wrong?" he rushed, concerned.

"Pills." I muttered, reaching into my bag and taking two of the little white pills out of the orange bottle. He took my hand and led me through the rooms until we discovered a kitchen were he poured some water for me to swallow them with. "Thanks, no idea what happened back there." I told him with a smile, my breathing slightly erratic, "Just got really dizzy, and they've been hurting a bit for a while."

"Then why didn't you take anything sooner! V you can't be in pain. I'll never stop worrying then!"

"I'm alright, don't worry about me Pete. What about you? How longs your arm been out of the sling?"

He shrugged, "A while, I've been holding it up a bit though. The slings at the house anyway." He explained and I nodded.

"Just don't stretch it too much." He rolled his eyes and smirked as we made our way back outside.

He stopped me just at the edge of the dance floor and I looked up at him in confusion, "Care to dance?"

I sighed and smile, "It would be my pleasure Gunner." He shot me a mock-scowl and I linked my arms around his neck as his right hand went to my waist, his left rested on my shoulder since he had to keep it crooked. .

"Are you ever going to stop with that?"

"Never." I grinned back at him.

He heaved a heavy sigh, "See, I don't think you understand how bad I feel about it. I shot my best friend. I could've killed you. In fact, I think I successfully halved your chances of survival." he told me lightly but I could tell he was serious.

"Well I'm alive and…well. No need to think about the 'what ifs' or the 'maybes'. There's no point in it. I know you feel bad Pete, but just think of it as payback for the countless times that I've tasered you and that one time when I accidently stabbed you…" That was about half a year ago when we were on a two week crash course, like Quantico. Everyone had to do one about every five months. We were doing a mock undercover one; what to do if your partner gets tied up or something. It all went well really, and it wasn't a formal practice; just a practice when we were bored. So when I got the knife to untie him I accidently dug it about one inch into his thigh, only a flesh wound luckily. We'd all laughed, then realised it was actually quite deep and we had to do something.

An evil smile appeared onto his face, "Ahh yes, that's right. Of course that wasn't life threatening…and the taser wasn't that bad…"  
>I gave his hair a sharp but gentle tug and he laughed, "Hey I'm trying to help you out here! You could come up with some name for me too…like…I dunno. Your imaginations better than mine. But I will keep you Gunner…"<p>

"You're a cruel woman Mars." He informed me and I just beamed at him. "How awkward was that up at the alter? I take it that was the infamous Logan Echolls?"

"The one and only. We're going to talk later and I'm just a tad scared." I told him cheerfully, "Plus, we never just talk. We always either fought or…well…"

"Gross." He interrupted with a grimace, "I did not need that knowledge Mars."

I laughed and shrugged but before I could say anything another voice cut in, "Hey Veronica," I turned my head to see Logan approaching and stepped away from Peter slightly, he spoke to him next, "Mind if I steal her away?" he asked with a stiff smile, but it wasn't really a question. Peter shrugged and gave me a small smile as Logan led me away from the party. We stopped at the brick wall that was the only protection between the patio and the 30 ft drop to the beach below, the ocean shimmering as the huge full moon was reflected onto its surface. I hadn't noticed how dark it had gotten. The whole patio had been lit up by the hundreds of little fairy lights strung from tree to tree.

We stood in silence for a minute, taking in the remarkable sight. I wasn't sure how to break the silence, so I went for the most average question possible, "So…how've you been?"

He chuckled quietly "Really? That's how we're going to start this?" I shrugged, hiding a smile myself, "Well, I'm fine. And have been for the past three years."

I gave him an amused but disparaging look, "More than that Logan. Start with where you went. Any why you took off without a word. No-one appreciated your little disappearing act you know." I told him bitterly.

He sighed and looked out at the water, "I just wanted to leave. There wasn't much reason to stay since we'd all graduated and everyone was leaving. Not telling anyone I was going or not giving anyone any warning was more one of those rash decisions that I always made. Then I felt too guilty to call or come back. I knew either you or Dick would kill me. Depends who got me first." He explained slowly and lightly.

I just looked at him for a minute, surprised, "Okay…I get the wanting to leave, who wouldn't. But the not calling when you had three years? That's a little pathetic…" Always a harsh word when it comes to arrogant men. He looked like he wanted to interrupt but I kept on going, "You know I looked for you for a bit after you left. I assumed you were in Tijuana or Aspen with some of your friends. Then you didn't reappear and I swear I even thought that the Sorokin's had come back." After our first year and all that drama Gory Sorokin and all his goons suddenly disappeared from campus. No-one knew where they were and I wasn't about to go back to Jake Kane.

"They didn't, trust me. After that time in the cafeteria for once I actually took your warning seriously. I talked to Jake he called Lev." I felt relieved at that, "As for where I went. I was in Mexico and Colorado for a bit but then I went to see a friend in Australia before moving to Boston until two weeks ago."

"Australia…?" Crap, as far as I knew he only had one contact in Australia…one mutual contact.

He nodded, "Mollymook's nice this time of year." He added coldly, his expression stony.

I sighed and looked up at him, "How'd you find out?"

"Weidman. He contacted me, sent me tickets and told me to get on a plane. I didn't know anything until Duncan Kane picked me up at the airport."

Well that was awkward. Surprisingly I didn't find myself jealous that Duncan hadn't contacted me. That ship had long since sailed, but it would've been nice to know how they were every once in a while. "How's Lilly? And how old?"

"Six, she's great. Crazy, mental. She looks just like Meg but somehow with Lilly's eyes…our Lilly." He explained, with a small smile.

"I wish I could see her again. But the whole FBI job and fugitive that I helped escape…don't think that would go down too well with the boss man." I said with a smirk.

"So you got there then? You're an agent?" He asked with a strange tone to his voice.

I nodded, "Special Agent." I added with a smile and he let out a quiet laugh, "I love it. I know you don't approve of all the danger and all that but it's so _good_! Going undercover on real cases, _real_ criminals. It's a good job." Except when you're getting your throat slit. I figured if I talked up how much I loved it and how good it was, then he wouldn't believe that anything had gone wrong. Of course who was I kidding? This was Logan.

"You mean 'proper' near death experiences? Well you've had plenty of 'fake' ones." Bitter…as always.

"Don't I know it." I muttered under my breath, not meaning for him to hear it.

"What's that supposed to mean?"

"Nothing…just that I'm fully aware of the dangers. Logan there really aren't so many of those 'close shaves' any more. We carry guns. We're careful; we have state of the art facilities and incredible protection. I've been trained to take down fully grown men at any given time. I am a whole lot safer, and stronger, that I used to be." List all the good things; convince him when you know that's impossible. I hated that whenever we talked about these things he always had that stubborn unconvinced look on his face. Like whatever I say, the jobs the job and he'll never accept it. I didn't know why that bothered me now. It never used to. It shouldn't.

He had a deep frown on his face at that, silent in thought for a minute. "So you could take me down?" he questioned, the corner of his lips curving up slightly, "I mean…I'm a 'fully grown man'."

That was a challenge. Damn why did he have to challenge me now. A few weeks and I'd be able to. "Yes." I told him simply, looking him straight in the eye with an innocent smile. It was strange how the atmosphere had shifted so quickly.

He nodded, "Now?"

Fuck, of course I couldn't now…but then he wouldn't believe me…"No, not now." I carried on before that self-satisfied look could take up permanent residence on his face, "Because I really like this dress."

"So do I but you said at any given time." He countered with a grin. Oh gawd…

I sighed and stepped closer to him, "Stand still." I ordered softly, I smiled when he gulped a little as I walked around to stand behind him, "I'm not going to do anything to hurt you." I told him, smirking evilly because I knew he couldn't see me. I could almost see the confused look on his face. "You see right now you're worried because you think I'm going to…undermine your incredible strength and manliness…" I said, only a little hint of sarcasm. I reached up and touched his back lightly to tease, I felt his muscles tense, "…which proves little trust since I said I wouldn't hurt you…" I was being horrible. I knew I was; after all our history and bottled up emotions I was torturing him and myself at the same time. Plus, trust, along with communication, had always been one of our main issues.

"What are you doing 'Ronica?" he called softly, I could hear the smile in his voice.

"I told you…nothing." I smiled. Not giving him any warning I suddenly knocked his knees forward, making his legs bend on reflex and he collapsed. I laughed and stepped to his side, watching him. He'd caught the wall before he hit the ground and was looking up at me in bemusement.

"Impressive. But a little juvenile." He smirked, jumping back to his feet.

"Yep. But you still dropped didn't you." He sent an amused glare, "Any other time I'd do it properly. But I doubt you'd appreciate that now. You still need the ability to walk for the rest of the night." He winced slightly at just the thought and I laughed, "Speaking of, we should probably get back."

He nodded, "Okay, urm…can we talk tomorrow? As in, actually talk about things?"

Did I want to do that? I was kind of enjoying this, just ignoring everything that was between us, "Yeah, I'm staying at my dad's."

"I know, he told me earlier. I'll come round, or maybe we can go out somewhere since that house seems a little busy lately." He suggested.

"Yeah, let's see then. But right now…let's just ignore everything. Like…just be normal. Ignore the awkwardness."

He smirked, "I think that's a good idea."

We stayed for a second more, and then returned to the party. Almost at the dance floor, Dick appeared in front of us. He pointed an outstretched arm at me and I blinked in amused surprise, "You."

"Me?" I questioned, glancing up at Logan who looked equally confused at his best friend's behaviour.

"Dance with me." He ordered, grabbing my hand and pulling me into the dancers before I could say anything. I just laughed and shook my head, "I'm a married man Ronnie Mars!" he yelled over the music, swirling us around in dizzying circled to the beat. I tried to ignore the image that flashed through my head at the name and forced the smile to stay in place. Thank god I took those painkillers.

"That you are Dick Casablancas. And I'll be watching you like a hawk. Never forget that Mac's my Q and I carry a gun." I reminded him teasingly and he let out a somewhat nervous laugh. Shortly after I found myself being suddenly switched to an equally excited Mac, "Hey there Mac Casablancas!"

She grinned, "I'm married! I'm a Casablancas! Four years ago I hated Dick's guts!"

"Four years ago we all did. Look how things change." I agreed, "Congratulations Mac. Wait…does this mean we can't call you Mac any more? Cass?"

"I'm always Mac. And _definitely_ not Cass." She said with a smile as I winced slightly, realising what I'd said. When he wasn't called Beaver we used to call Cassidy Casablancas 'Cass'. That was always a tender subject among me, Mac, Dick and Logan sometimes.

"Moving swiftly on!" she laughed and I smiled, relieved as the awkward moment passed quickly, "Honeymoon! You're flight is in four hours. I still think you're going to the Caribbean. Barbados perhaps." I told her as we swayed around the busy dance floor.

"I dunno…that _would_ be nice. But I'm looking forward to a surprise. I'm jus so excited you don't understand!"

"I'm happy for you Maccy, but you're still my Q."

She laughed and hugged me, "Of course Bond! What would I do without my 007?" I grinned and nodded in agreement, "But I should go find my husband." With a final smile she hurried off into the crowd. I spotted Logan standing at the edge of the dance floor with Wallace so I picked up the long skirt slightly so as not to trip, and made my way over to stand in front of them.

"I think that you two both owe me a dance." I informed them.

They both smiled, Wallace spoke first, "Supa Fly if _I_ danced with you our incredible awesomeness will wipe out the entire room."

I laughed, "Okay okay Papa Bear; you know how to let a girl down nicely." He grinned and I looked expectantly at Logan.

He just smirked and held out a hand which I took, trying to ignore the little fireworks at the contact. "If I must." He said teasingly and I gave him a mock gasp. Chuckling quietly, he led me to the floor and spun me round before settling us in position; his arms around my waist and mine his neck, swaying to the music just as Laura Izibor 'Mmm' was played.

"And of course now would be the time that the DJ chose to put on the slow songs." He said with a smirk and I laughed quietly, linking my fingers together behind his neck.

"Just typical." And that was the absolute truth. It was also the truth that we _always_ made the worst of the most perfect situations. I barely noticed the time or songs go by; being in his arms like this again after so long was so weirdly comforting.

After a while he broke the silence, "So who's your friend?" I looked up at him in confusion and he nodded towards the table, "The guy talking to your Dad, Weevil and Wallace." I glanced over to see Peter with them, all laughing at something. At that moment he glanced over at me and we exchanged a small smile before he turned back to the other three.

"That's Peter; he's one of my best friends back in New York." I told him with a smile, "Wanna meet him?" He made a face and I smirked, "C'mon," I said, taking his hand and guiding him over to the table where Peter, my dad and Wallace were talking. We sat down; me next to Peter and Logan on my other side.

They all seemed to be in a pretty intense conversation, "Watcha talking about?" I questioned, taking a sip of Peter's beer.

"Work in the FBI." Dad told me and I smiled, a little surprised. Back when I'd lived here and was at Hearst, it would have been a perfectly normal conversation; but now, after everything, it seemed a little weird.

"Oh? What about it?" I asked, glancing at Peter who just shrugged.

"Just what we do, how safe it is. Stuff like that." Well of course, what else is there to talk about?

"But clearly it isn't that safe," Logan said from beside me and I looked at him in confusion, "All that stuff that happened in New York a few weeks ago? It was all over the news. FBI work doesn't sound too safe to me." I froze at that, my eyes wide with shock. America was so huge I was stupid enough to think that something happening on the East Coast wouldn't be so known to those on the West. Stupid, stupid Veronica. I felt Peter reach for my hand and squeeze it, knowing my reaction. Apparently everyone else noticed it too. "What's wrong?" Logan asked.

I just shook my head and looked at Peter who nodded in understanding, "The agent was one of our pretty close friends. She was one of our team." There was a shocked silence after that; I guess no-one knew what to say. It had only been a few months at most; it took a long time to get over a friend. Especially when we'd both been face to face with her killer…more nose to nose…knife to neck…

I shivered and blinked, just as my dad spoke slowly and quietly, "I'm sorry…you didn't say anything."

"Its fine," I muttered, still gripping Peter's hand. I just wanted to go home, get into bed, curl up and try not to think of Benjamin Jack…but I didn't want to be alone. When I was alone all I could think about was him.

More silence before Wallace spoke, sounding cautious, "You said she was one of your team…doesn't that mean…-"I closed my eyes, taking a deep breath. So it was coming out now, at Mac and Dick's wedding. The fact that we, Peter and I, had been the last almost-victims of one of the biggest serial killers and FBI cases, in New York, in the last decade (a/n: I doubt that's a fact, but for now it is ) this was not what I intended when I sat down at this table. Pete squeezed my hand and, reluctantly, I opened my eyes and looked over at him. He just gave me a reassuring smile.

One more deep breath, I looked at my dad, "Can we not do this here?"

His eyes widened in absolute shock and…anger…yes there was definitely anger. How had I not told him this? How could I keep this from him? How could I go through with such a dangerous case? How could I put myself in such danger? I couldn't take it tonight.

"It's true?"

I sighed, "Not tonight Dad."

"No, we're talking about this now. You can't keep this from me Veronica. I have a right to know."

"Well I'm not telling you anything tonight! If you want to know so bad then call Hendricks. I can't talk about it now!" I shouted, barely noticing my voice rising. I got up and stormed away from the table, heading inside. I didn't stop moving, I just kept walking around the house, no idea where I was going. It was so big I was likely to get lost. But I had to keep moving, I couldn't stop because then I'd realise that I was alone in a massive empty house. A dark house…a dark corridor…it was about fifteen metres long, open doors leading off into dark rooms. At the end splitting off two ways. A few metres behind me were the stairs. My heart was drumming loudly in my ears, echoing around the house. Panic.

The air seemed to shift around me, an icy draught coming in through a window to my right…through the dark doorway I was next to. Frozen in fear, I saw the figure…the dark silhouette against the window. It lurched forwards as I turned my head. The mask… I screamed, I couldn't hold it in. I just screamed and stumbled backwards, hitting the wall as the mask hovered an inch from my face. And then I couldn't move, I couldn't make a sound…I couldn't breathe…

"_Ronniiieeeee...__"_ that nightmarish voice breathed, _"__I__'__ll__get__you__Ronnie,__you__can__'__t__hide__anymore.__Whenever__you__'__re__alone__…__I__'__ll__always__be__with__you__then__…__you__can__'__t__get__away__Ronnie.__" _

"Ronnie! Veronica open your eyes!" Someone shook me out of my nightmare, hands on my shoulders, keeping me stable. My eyes flickered open and I jumped at the face a few inches from mine, letting out a small whimper of fear. "What's wrong? What happened?" My breathing was too heavy; it hurt, and the screams must have ripped my stitches because I could feel something wet trickling down my neck. "Ronnie you're bleeding…"

I hardly knew what I was doing anymore, I felt like I wasn't in control of my body. I ducked forwards and clamped my arms around his waist, hugging him tight and shaking with a mixture of fear and sobs, I wasn't sure which. He wrapped his arms around me, probably confused, "Fuck Ronnie what's wrong?" I just shook my head, unable to speak. After a second I felt him lift me up into his arms, the pain at my side barely registering. And then I was being set down on a bed somewhere and he was moving to let go of me.

"No, stay…" I managed, gripping his arm. I couldn't bear to be alone…

"Relax; I'll be less than a minute." He said soothingly before disappearing into another room. And sure enough I didn't even have time to start shivering before he was back with a bowl of water and a cloth, switching the light on. My heartbeat had slowed down a little now and I could just about breathe properly, but it still hurt a little. "What happened back there? I just heard you screaming your head off and ran up to find you absolutely petrified. What got you so scared Ron-"

"Don't call me that." I croaked, cutting him off.

He frowned, "But I've always called you Ro-"

"Please Logan! Don't. I can't-"

"Whoa, okay! Alright I won't call you that! But please, tell me what happened. I've never seen you like this before, it's freaking me out; I don't know what to do with this Veronica."

I understood that, of course I did. I never acted like this; I never allowed myself too. "Just memories. Nightmares. Don't worry about it."

At that he just scoffed, "Don't do that Veronica. Don't act like that and not give me an explanation, that's not fair."

"Not fair! It's perfectly fair! I don't have to tell you anything." Finishing, I grabbed the cloth from the bowl and pressing it against my sore throat, trying to ignore him. After a few minutes of silence he let out a sigh and took the cloth from me, taking over. Reluctantly I let him.

"You haven't changed have you R-Veronica?"

I frowned at that, "Yeah I have. More than you would know." I'd definitely changed in the last few years, let alone the past few months. How could I not? Having a friend murdered and another almost killed is bound to change a person. Being unknowingly stalked around an abandoned house by a psycho-murderer changes people a hell of a lot. We fell into silence and I could sense the disappointment rolling off him. He didn't believe me. He expected me to be the same cruel heartbreaking bitch that left all those years ago. I didn't know if she was still here. I let out a heavy breath as he put the bloodied cloth in the water, "I thought I saw someone." I told him quietly, not looking him in the eye, "Out of the corner of my eye. It freaked me out… That case messed us all up."

He looked at me with a pained expression on his face, "Will you ever talk to me about it?"

Not what should I say to that? I just bit my lip, looking at him, "I haven't seen you in a long time Logan…" That was all it took for his face to fall, nodding in understanding. I sighed and reached out to touch his hand, making him look back up at me, "But maybe…one day soon…who knows what will happen while we're back."

Once again we fell into silence, and once again he broke it, "What happened to your neck 'Ronica?" he asked softly, tentative.

I let out a quiet sigh, lying back against the pillows and closing my eyes, "I guess you'll find out tomorrow." I wasn't going to go into it now and he knew that. After a minute or two I felt the bed dip beside me as he lay down. And that's how we stayed for a while; just happy for each other's company, that was all we needed.

** Now that went on for a long time and I got bored I hope it wasn't too much of a disappointment and I hope I haven't lost too many readers in the long abandonment. Please review and tell me what you think. Thank you.**

**-M**


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